It is hard to live here. I do not care if that sounds extreme. Jesus once said it is easier for a camel to get through an eye of a needle than for a rich man to get into heaven. I always agreed pointing towards the rich in America, indicating how hard it would be for them to give it all up. How ridiculous I have been. I am the rich. The poorest in America are still in the top 5% richest in the world. I am in the top 2%. I am the elite, the rich, the privileged. Jesus was talking about me. This burns in my chest. Where is the line? Is there one? How do I live here without feeling guilty everyday? Eat food without counting the children that could be fed with the left overs? Think about how many could live in my bedroom or could be housed with half of the money I could earn everyday. It is an impossible balance. There is not one. To cope I have to push the memories into the back of my mind, try to forget it for a moment- for a time.